For a long time, saying no made me feel like I was doing something wrong. Not necessarily because anyone told me that. It was just how it felt. If someone was disappointed because of a decision I made, I felt bad. If I knew I could help but chose not to, I felt selfish. If I had the time but simply did not want to do something, that somehow felt like it was not a good enough reason. So a lot of the time, I said yes. Yes when I was tired. Yes when I did not really feel like go

For a long time, I thought love and safety were basically the same thing. If someone loved me, I assumed I should feel secure. If they cared about me, I assumed I should be able to relax. And if the relationship was not abusive, chaotic, or obviously unhealthy, I thought maybe I should just be grateful for what I had. But that turned out to be much more complicated than I understood. Because someone can love you and still not know how to make you feel emotionally safe. Someon

For a long time, I thought being a loving person meant giving more. More patience. More understanding. More time. More chances. I thought love meant showing up even when I was tired. Being the person people could count on. Making things easier for everyone around me. Adjusting when something wasn't working. Carrying a little more because I knew I could. And the truth is, I am still a generous person. I still love deeply. I still care deeply. I still want the people I love to